The Love Bank
Psalm 18:6 In my distress [when seemingly closed in] I called upon the Lord and cried to my God; He heard my voice out of His temple (heavenly dwelling place), and my cry came before Him, into His [very] ears.
Strangers have no deep conversations, or self-disclosures. You might pass one on the street or when driving by them in a car. You may wave, or even say, Hello, but that will be depths of your efforts. Acquaintances on the other hand can have some small talk and possibly discuss things that are centered around commonalities: “How’s the weather? How about those Panthers? Fall is approaching. The Sun is rising later and going down earlier. I’m having a hard time waking up.” Neighbors, and Co-workers will have conversations around shared experiences, and their connection will grow. You know each other’s names. You know your spouses names, kids names, or each others grand kids names. Friendship, on the other hand, switches everything from impersonal to personal things within our heart. Trust is the key. The trust grows because we have an affinity towards one another.
What changes all of these things? What moves the emotional walls and barriers we’ve erected and allows people to have access to the real us? Need, desperation, vulnerability, transparency. Sadly, all the relational categories listed above mirror relationships that people have with God. Do we know God’s heart? Does our relationship with Him resemble a stranger, an acquaintance, neighbor, or someone you’re wedded too? Does your relationship with Him consist mostly of your mind or is it one of the heart? Do you know His heart? The deeper the relationship the deeper the communication. How much I tell you about my heart will be based on our history, our commitment, and how much you share. Relationships only thrive in commitment. Do you know Him well enough to detect which aspect of the Godhead is talking to you, working in your life, drawing you? Are you so intimate with the Godhead that you know the work of the Father, or the unique work of Jesus, or the Spirit? This morning as I was seeking to have communion with Him something dawned on me that I had never thought about. My relationship to the Father is one of being His son. My relationship to Jesus on the other hand makes me His brother. But guess Who comes alongside me like a Friend showing me Jesus, teaching me the Word, reminding me of what’s in the Word, praying through me, and feeding me? That’s my Friend the Holy Spirit. Do you know Him like that?
Years ago Jackie and I read a book entitled, His Needs, Her Needs. The author, Willard F. Harley, Jr. proposed a very practical tool in developing greater intimacy with your spouse. The tool? The Love Bank. Based on his needs, and her needs, spouses are either making deposits in the “Love Bank” or withdrawals (not to be confused with the Love Shack). Question is, Are you making deposits or withdrawals into God’s Love Bank? Obviously He doesn’t need anything but He does love us, and nothing can change that love –but are we investing in knowing Him? In this season of Elul do you have anything you need to change your mind or lifestyle about?
(For More On Intimacy with Jesus look for John Paul Jacksons’ ministry, Stream’s Ministries International. He discusses this topic in greater detail)
